Called and Free

Some of you know that I am pregnant, we are so blessed to be expanding our family. Between pregnancy,  work,  school, church and family I have had a hard lesson in how life cannot be planned. Though, we think and desire to plan every little thing in our lives, sometimes what we have planned is not what is really in the plan. God has really stretched me in so many ways. Physically I have been challenged, emotionally I have been stretched and I have had to let go and lean on other people way beyond my comfort zone. The amazing thing is that no matter how my day to day is unfolding, I know that God is right there orchestrating every detail, no matter how minor. When I think about how much He loves me to carefully manuever things in my life for my good, honestly, I get emotional. Not to get too deep, I have never felt so loved, that someone would carefully plan and watch out for me as my Father in Heaven does. Recently, I felt overwhelmed and disappointed in my inability to m...

One of the hardest, yet most valuable lessons I have learned as a Christ follower, is that your "dry" season can yield the  most growth. What I mean by this is sometimes you aren't going to feel all warm and fuzzy about your relationship with God. Being that I am not an overly emotional person, sometimes I wonder if I just can't "feel" God, beacuse I don't sob at every service. As I have matured in my walk, I've learned to press through those feelings and stayed focused. This can be challenging for our flesh as we have the need to "feel" things. Let me clarify, I KNOW God is with me, I just may not "feel" what He is doing in my life. This takes me to my point, when it is hard to "feel" how God is moving in your life, remember His promise in His word. He will never leave you nor foresake you. These times can be hard because the enemy will take the oppurtunity to break you down. He will try to plant thoughts that are untru...

As I carry on with my daily life, work, kid, school, church, house, and so on I find myself becoming complacent. I'm sure no one else has ever experienced this, just me, right? I try to stay in constant contact with my Creator, but sometimes like any long term relationship, someone starts to neglect the other. I then start to rationalize, well  I am  at church what feels like a lot. That has to count for something, right? Here's the thing, He never neglects me, so how could I possibly neglect Him? He is there for me everytime I need Him, not just when I fit into His schedule. How amazing is that, He always has time for me as He takes time for everyone. I love that about Him. This is where I think prayer and study is so important. Gods' language is prayer and His gift is the Word. Deuteronomy 4:29 But if from there you seek the Lord your God, you will find him if you seek Him with all your heart and with all your soul. The thing I love the most, is that He loves me all the ...

Don't be afraid, fear not, have no fear, although there are variations of how it is stated in the Bible, the point is the same. 365 times these "phrases" together are listed in the Word, telling us, everyday of every year, we should not be afraid. Recently, I have become more aware of how afraid we are. Some of us are afraid of death, some of change, others of failure and everything in between. We are gripped by fear keeping us from acheiving our fullest potential. Philipians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Proverbs 3:5-8 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil. This will bring health to your bo...

We have all been offended at one time or another, right? I know I have, too many to name. The wonderful thing about walking with the Holy Spirit is that He has enabled me to love and have mercy. Both are things I have had to learn to do, sometimes the hard way. It may be easy to love someone when all is well, but man if they slip up, watch out! But really, this is where Jesus has really tried to help us change. Love one another is a lesson repeated in the scriptures. Let's be real, we are all going to be offended, that's life. What we have to learn to control is how we respond. When we are offended do we lash out, become angry, or gossip? Or, do we turn to the Great Creator to soften our hearts to help us to love those through our offense? I believe it is important to remember that we are always being looked at for a response. Not only are others watching us, God is constantly watching us. James 1:22 Do not merely listen to the word, and so decieve yourselves. Do what it ...

Understandably we as humans want rationale and proof of everything. As most of you know, having a relationship with God is very faith based. For years, I myself pondering on the evidence of Christianity. How do we know for sure that there is a God or that he hears us. From personal experience of having these same questions I relate to those searching and those who have questions. I once was told by a very wise and educated Pastor to encourage someone who is very scientific to pray for one  month, everyday and see at the end of that month if their life had changed. Great advice, I believe, because as a believer I know God can move mountains and more, in 30 days. I was recently watching a series of shows that a researcher is proving Jesus existed scientifically. While, I myself am a very scientific person, I was intrigued and excited to see someone researching one of the most important subjects around. I could go on and on with what I believe is proof that God exists, but what I was ...

So much to be thankful for today, I still need reminders sometimes to keep my focus on what's RIGHT. Right, you ask? Well, the day to day can be so tiring, and mundane. Routine is so important to help us, but sometimes I think we need to be reminded of what's important and right in God's eyes, not ours. There is so much happening in our society today that we naturally as humans can become side tracked and forget what is right. Love, that is what is right and for me that can be challenging. Maybe it's because at times I didn't feel loved or maybe at times I wasn't really loved. Regardless, now it is my "duty" to love as He loved me. He loved me enough to die for me. He was persecuted for me, little ol' me. So, now I have to love as He loved me. The question I sometimes ask, is can I really love the same as He does? I believe that it maybe difficult for me sometimes, but I can not limit what God can change in me. No matter what injustice I believe is...

I promise I am not slacking.......I have been taking a condensed college class that is consuming much of my free time! I hope to soon be able to devote more time to the blog. God is really working in my life and in my family. So many things are changing and growing it is amazing to know how much He loves me to focus on me. I encourage everyone to set your path directly on Him. Summer can be fun and packed with so many things, wonderful things. But, let's remain in His presence as we journey through our busy lives. God, today I am thankful for who you are and how you live inside of me. I promise to be led by your Spirit and pray for clarity today so I can hear and be guided by you with perfect understanding. I give you all the praise and glory......

It is so easy to point the finger and place blame. Have you ever felt so challenged that you feel that the only escape is to pass whatever it is on? Oh, my how hard it is to have to look at oneself. As I have walked through my journey there are so many times I have had to make myself reflect on me. I've realized that this is a choice. We either choose to look at ourselves or we point the finger in a direction that makes others look away from us. The crazy thing is, that Gods sees us for what and who we are. Not only does he see us, he loves us. Why then is it so hard to love ourselves enough to reflect for a moment. Well, unfortunately, I know the answer to this question......firsthand. It is uncomfortable. We are in such a "feel good" time right now in this world, that if it doesn't make us "feel good" we don't want anything to do with it. There is a reason they are called growing pains. As the growth plates of a child grow in their bones it is uncomfor...

I remember hearing Joyce Meyer one day say that God can stretch your time and make time available to you  beyond what you think. Though, my first reaction was....wow, that is awesome, I never thought of that. My next thought was......is that possible? I mean we all get the same amount of time in a day, right? But then, I had a real growing relationship with God and now I realize how true that statement is. Looking back on how my life was, I thought there was never time to do anything and honestly I hardly did anything at all. I mean, I work full time, I'm a wife and a mom, I had a couple of good friends and did some stuff, but man I had no idea how God could stretch even a minute. God really has stretched my time, beyond and beyond. Some days are better than others, of course. All in all though, man I am living more now than I ever imagined I could. It is awesome, I am so much more productive. It is hard today to be a mom that works or a stay at home mom, a wife and a Chr...

Most have you have heard, seen or lived through the tropical storm recently in our area. As I have mentioned in previous blogs, I love the song Praise You in the Storm. Though never looking at the song literally, I now have. Not exactly sure why, but this time I have felt more in awe of the power of a storm. Granted, my view is different because I am not having to move or completely remodel my home, as many of my neighbors are. I have been reminded of Gods' power and His mercy, and how powerful both are. Again, it may be easy for me to be more positive because we were only minimally effected by the storm. But, as I ponder on how powerful God can be, that he can create a weather pattern that literally dumps 30 inches of rain onto the earth. I have also tried to remember the mercy He gave us, when the rain just stopped. Yes there was still damage, but can we see Praise You through the storm? I can try.....I truly believe that families are closer and things are in perspective for...

Like a lot of people, I grew up in church, well until adolescences. Granted the denomination of church I grew up in was fairly sedate or regimented. I was blessed to, in adolescences be exposed to a more Spirit filled church. Which would prove to help with my ease into a very Spirit filled church later in life. I always thought church is where you learn and sit quite while you are taught. Over the years though I felt pulled by the Lord to having a closer more intimate relationship with Him. Over the last few years I began going back to a church that was a great blend of contemporary and traditional. Honestly, it was a great "starting" point for me. Through divine appointment, I landed in a church that most would consider very Spirit filled. The type of church I would have been intimidated by in years past. Now, I could not see myself anywhere else. It has recently brought to my attention how "unalive" the church is. I use the term unalive instead of dead to not offe...

So, I've been thinking a lot about how faithful God is when I trust Him. Lately, like most of us, I have had my fair share of trials. I have had my moments of weakness, or shall I say my cries to God. I try to remember when I am crying out to Him, to not ask why, but to say " I may not understand, but I trust you." And, yes, I say it aloud. I have been challenged with physical trials most recently, which have been difficult for me because I pride myself on my ability to overcome. But, when I am physically weak, it is so much more of a challenge for me to stay focused. I have been so blessed to have been chosen by the great Creator to be strengthened through so many trials. Casting Crowns sings a song called Praise You In This Storm that really has touched me. It's crazy how I can be right in the middle  of something and a song will come on the radio, that speaks directly to me. Psalm 33:4 For the word of the Lord is right and true; he is faithful in all he does. In  ...

Recently I was driving with my son in the rain and it was a good steady rain. As we approached a stop light he commented "the rain is getting lighter because I prayed it would". Confused I asked him to repeat what he had said and he did. My initial reaction was to tell him that it was still raining just as hard as it was when we left. Then, I realized that he believed that God had answered his prayers and was reminded how my faith should be like his. Even though the rain fell the same, he knew God would answer his prayers. How often do we get caught up in our flesh knowledge that we forget that God tells us to have faith like a child. Jesus tells us in Mark 10:15,  and then again in Luke 18:17  that we should come to Him as children to enter the Kingdom. We become so jaded by our experiences of life that we forget that He answers our prayers, small or big. In Hebrews 11: 1-13  we are reminded what faith truly means and those who trusted God throughout the Bible despi...

So lately I started a new workout regimen, and man I miss that soreness that reminds you worked hard. During an intimate moment in Gods presence I realized that being a Christian is like working out. Silly analogy I guess, but for me it put a lot into perspective. I feel like growing pains in the life of a Christian is like a good workout. You are really sore and may even feel like a Mac truck ran you over, but you know that it's all for your good health. Spiritually growing to me is just like that. Sometimes you feel achy and worn out, but if you keep your eye on the prize, you know it's all for your good. Colo 1:11-12 being strengthened with all power according to His glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light.  So, just like working out takes endurance, so does having faith. We are made to overcome that pain, the pain of growth...

Well, 14 hours of working in the ICU today......one of the busiest days I have had in a while. I had a moment of thinking how desensitized I am to death. It's crazy, someones worst day of their life is just another day at work for me. I honestly do not know how I would survive without my relationship with God. I am so quickly reminded how precious life really is. Though, I can never dwell on that fact for too long, a reminder from time to time is always healthy. The bible tells us that our lives are like a vapour and for most that is figurative, but when faced with the situations I see, I am reminded that it is a reality. These moments of reminder allow me to refocus on Him. It is so easy to get discouraged and lose focus, but I thank Him for my simple reminders. To have His Spirit with me is comforting beyond measure. It allows me to understand circumstances on a whole different level. I am so fortunate to be loved so much by Him. I just wanted to share this thought, never forget ...

Sometimes we get pushed out of our comfort zone. For some of us, its a challenge and for some of us, it causes great anxiety. One of the things I love about the Lord is His unfailing ability to push me out of my comfort zone at just the right time. Initially I may question the timing, or my ability. But He can orchestrate situations that begin uncomfortably, but end with the feeling of empowerment beyond comprehension. I am so blessed to have people in my life that will push me beyond what I think is possible and that encourage me in the process. I have overcome and learned so much through these experiences. You know how there are things that you always wanted to do, but look back and think "It's too late now or I'll never do that". I am here to tell you, you can. Phil 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.  This is such a profound verse. The hard to grasp part is ALL things, yes.....that means ALL, really, ALL. I love that! I mean, don't get ...

What does it really mean to survive? For some it's a rough day at work, others overcoming an abusive childhood, and some the tragic accident or near death experience. We all survive differently, in our own ways, from our own things. Always having thought of myself as a survivor, I recently watched a show where a woman held at gun point, fought back and was shot several times. Tears fell from my eyes the entire time. How could someone survive something so horrific? What supernatural strength she had. I could not imagine. Is it even fair to correlate my story of survival to hers? I love how things can be put into perspective for me, just like that.  Gala 2:20   I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I know this is an extreme example of surviving, but this is truly how extreme our fight is. We are out...

So blessed, I have had the pleasure of having so many strong women planted in my life. Growing up without a mother figure in my life, God placed certain women in my path at certain times to help direct and minister to me. Having learned to work on cars and most maintenance around the house, there are just somethings a dad has difficulty teaching a daughter. God having a watchful eye over me during my earlier years, he was careful to place women around me to plant seeds. How amazing He is!! Gods planning is so intricate, that looking back, I had no idea how he was carefully planting seeds throughout my life. Psalm 32:7-8 You are my hiding place; You shall preserve me from trouble; you shall surround me with songs of deliverance. I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will guide you with My eye. Though there were times I was not even aware of how God was watching over me, His mercy is so great that He always had a "mothers" eye on me. I beli...

I would like to thank everyone who has taken the time to read this blog, it means a lot to have your support. I am just a regular woman with the desire to reach others through Gods' love. I am not perfect,  nor close to it. Writing has always been a passion of mine, and now with the internet you have such a platform to reach people and communicate. It was laid on my heart to start a blog and even though I'm not great at public forums and never been super interested in social media. I'm trusting God for my words and hope only to encourage. There was a time when I knew who God was, but I did not truly KNOW Him. Also, there was a time when I thought, like most, I could never be one of those Christians. God has allowed me to overcome and grow beyond what I ever thought possible. He has brought me out of my comfort zone and remained so faithful to me, that I only want to share Him with everybody! I continue to be in awe of His glory. I thank God for loving and choosing me to be ...

One of the most difficult traits of a Christ follower, in my opinion is, forgiveness. Have you ever thought you forgave someone and then, bam!! those feelings of anger or betrayal come right back to the surface out of no where? I have, forgiveness was such a learning experience for me, a long and uncomfortable one. Priding myself on my strength and ability to overcome, for so long, I was only kidding myself. A recent definition of forgiveness I read was to no longer blame or be angry with someone who has done you wrong. To no longer? Like, ever? Only strong Christians can do this, right? No, wrong God has equipped us with the power of forgiveness, we just have to want to do it. That's right, it's a choice. I've talked to so many people who are still angry over what happened to them in their childhoods or past relationships or marriages. Listen, I get it, it's not so easy to forgive, much less forget. Matt 6:14-15 clearly states forgive men their trespasses, so your heav...

There is so much pressure today for women. We have to be great moms, awesome wives, loyal employees, and perfect Christians. I mean, really, is that even possible? How can we be all of these things all the time? Well, first I thank God for His unfailing mercy and grace. Because, boy do I need it most of the time! Second, I realize that I am a work in progress and as long as I'm getting "better" I'm heading in the right direction. I was a mess before I began truly walking with God. My house was a mess, my relationships were messy, and my mind was a mess. Thank you Jesus for saving me from myself! Can I get an, Amen?? I can still be a mess, just not as often. My house is still a mess a lot of the time, but my mind is more focused and clean, for sure. Most of all, I've learned to cut myself some slack and trust in the Lord. It's funny how our priorities are skewed when we are not focused on the prize. The prize being The Kingdom. The Kingdom for me is here and no...

One of the reasons I love Joyce Meyer is that she is matter of fact and covers continually matters of emotion. We all have emotions, but what we do with them is the important thing. Emotions are normal and human to have. But, we must control our emotions and not let them control us. Man, this can be difficult how often do we yell at our kids or our husbands? Or get our feelings hurt when someone is not "nice" to us. We're human..... and women, right? From anger to joy, anxiety to peace, we are constantly feeling. God knows this, He created us! He created us to be strong, to endure, we are His warriors, His soldiers. That's right ladies you have been chosen to be in this war and it's not necessarily physically demanding, but mentally. So, I am here to tell you we must stand strong and be clear. For me clarity involves understanding. The devil is constantly on the prowl waiting for us to give in to our thoughts and our emotions. (1Peter 5: 8-11) Okay, so I understan...

I love the analogy that sometimes lifes' trials are like waves crashing. If you've ever been caught in waves or a ripp current you know that what gets you back to shore or above water is discipline. Staying calm and disciplining yourself to remain aware enough of what is happening, though you are out of breath and freaking out.That is what will get you back to safety. Since I began my walk with Christ I realized that making it through life was going to require obedience. It is so easy to be taken by the waves of emotion. Easily we struggle, lose our way and sink to the bottom. Recently I was reminded that by staying obedient will cause breakthrough that you never imagined. Supernatural breakthrough beyond any expectation that we can fathom. To me discipline requires faith, true faith. It's easy to say I trust Him or I know God can do that. But, when you have waves crashing around you, real faith is staying calm and knowing that God has equipped you with the power to defeat ...

Boy do I love a challenge, but this one gets me every time. I mean let's be real, who really wants to love there enemy? I think like most I wish I could live in my false reality that everyone will like me all the time. But, we all know that is not going to happen. People are going to not like and maybe even hate you, especially when you are proud of your Lord and Savior. Ironically, as you grow and are learning to love everyone and everything God created, you then have a target on your back. I mean is it just me or has anyone else ever experienced this? Well, I'm here to tell you it happens and even to the most loving and honest people under Gods' command. Honestly, I always think about how Jesus was persecuted during his ministry. Even though only a short time of his ministry was documented in the Bible it is clearly stated that people disliked and even hated Him. He was even betrayed by his own apostles or friends. I mean I wasn't there, but I assume they were togethe...

I've noticed that one of the biggest misconceptions of Christians is that we think we are perfect. I too, was one who accused and refused to attend a church because of  "hypocrites". Now, that I am one of those Christians, I love to be the example of imperfection in the church. Do I try? Sure, I try to be as close to His image as humanly possible, key word....humanly. We are human, we make mistakes, we are imperfect! I love most that God loves me through my imperfections and loves me enough to mold me and sculpt me into the person He sees I should be. Trust me, I do know that there are in fact hypocrites in the church, but hey, at  least they are going. I pray for those people. Sadly I have noticed that women tend to be the hardest on each other. Ironically, we are the ones that desperately desire relationships with other women, but more often than not we sabotage them by our own insecurities. We are so offended, all the time. And I'm sorry, we have to STOP and encou...

I'll never forget the day I realized who God really was to me. I was driving to work, which was and still is sometimes the most private moments I have with the Lord. It's a 45 minute drive, so I can turn off the radio and spend time with God. I was having a moment, realizing that I was a child of someone who did not want to be a parent. Two people had brought me into the world, but for whatever the reason, I was not even close to a priority. Not a happy feeling when you realize this about yourself. As I was grieving, I heard the Lord say, "I am your father" and realized then that even greater than any flesh parent God paired me with......I had Him. He was my father and my mother. Tears began to fall from my eyes, so bitter sweet. Though the very two people that should always love you here on earth, I realized did not or could not, at that moment I knew I would forever have unconditional love from my Father the Lord. I wept knowing that I was loved greater than I cou...